“Heroism is courage despite consequence.” From B.C. comic strip by Mastroianni and Hart
Loss and Sovereignty
Yesterday, I learned that an 8 month old who I’d had the pleasure of meeting, holding, interacting with, had died. I knew she was sick but I was certain that God was going to make it so that she’d pull through. I was certain, even if it took a miracle, that chemo would work. I was certain.
So, when I got the news yesterday, and realized that that young couple, her parents, would return to an empty car seat, an empty crib, an empty baby’s room, that I would never again see those little feet dangling from a carrier or those little chubby fingers tucked securely in her mouth, serving as a snack until real nourishment came, I was overcome with such emotion that I had to close my office door for a while and simply stare out the window, tears streaming. There was such a heaviness and disappointment. It was hard to focus the remainder of the day. I got some work done, but not as much as I’d planned, for I couldn’t fully concentrate. And that was from me…I cannot fathom what her parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles must be feeling. I cannot fathom.
I arose this morning, still wondering why babies are allowed to get sick and die before their parents; it seems unnatural. I didn’t want the trite answer of, “God needs them there with Him more than here” or some such. I know I’ve heard logical explanations before but none would resurface for me. And then. And then I heard Darryl Coley singing, “God Is Sovereign.” I heard him singing clearly and I came to rest in the fact that He knows best. Even when we don’t understand and may never understand on this side of Heaven, He is still on the throne and knows best. I have to end with, while I would have preferred that her suffering end on this side of Heaven and her parents not have to endure this hardship, there is comfort in the fact that she is suffering no more. I know that God will grant her family the peace and strength needed to get through the funeral, burial, and life thereafter. There is comfort in that as well.
Purpose
“The darkest places in hell are reserved for those who maintain their neutrality in times of moral crisis.” Dante Alighieri
Let’s face it: We are part of the problem OR we are part of the solution. Ponder which side you are on in the present and which side you will choose in the future. Ponder…and then take action.
#purposefulpursuits #livingwithpassion #livingwithpurpose #makeadifference #purpose
My Reflection on “Black Lives Matter”
When I first heard the term “Black Lives Matter”, I was offended because I am SUCH a celebrator of all races and cultures that I considered the phrase to be exclusionary. However, as time and crime and injustice has progressed, I have listened more closely and come to understand the intent behind the phrase. All lives matter, yes, but more of us must come to accept that black lives matter…TOO! Black lives, men and women, are just as important as all else (same can be said for Native Americans, as this is another race that is often harassed and undermined). But back to my own primary race, there appears to be an evilness that wants to gain strength in its quest to target and ravish the black community. Our children are targeted in schools AND on the streets, their punishments within educational institutions are greater and stricter (ex: school to prison pipeline and frequency of expulsion), objectivity is subjective, and fairness is not meted out equally (so fairness ain’t fair). This goes beyond our police officers.
If what is happening in current day was new, it would be less egregious. However, it’s not new; it is a continuance of past treatment, only highlighted and more exposed now because of social media and the ease to capture and expose injustices with the use of cell phones. No, not new. The black on black crime rate is newer than the load of crap and injustice that is occurring in current day America. My mind screams why, why, why??!?!? Why are we STILL dealing with an inability to simply see people as people and NOT see color first? Why won’t it stop? When will it stop? What will it take, IN ADDITION to prayer, for it to stop? Yes, I threw prayer in there. I do believe it is necessary to seek God in prayer during these times, as more people did in the past. But, prayer is a portion of the needed movement, the needed resurrection of change. While I constantly hear discussion on areas for change, I still ask how to effect mass change that has to affect the mind and the heart, in order to have an external impact? I don’t know right now but I do know that it will take more than a few months, more than a few politicians on each side of the congressional aisle, more than a few people in power, more than a few preachers, educators, commentators, and grass roots advocates…it will take a lot more than just a few. The cynical, bottom line portion of my personality screams: “Let talks and collaboration begin, but talk only if it will lead to proper action to ensure justice for all, all the time.” To discuss and remain without action need not be the choice that America decides to take, for if we choose to put this issue on the back burner, America will find itself at war within, and Dallas will seem minuscule.
Ending thought: I am aware that my church provided a forum, also known as a safe environment, for black men to have a discussion after last week. We will enfold families into such a discussion in the future. Bishop Jakes’ church held something of a community forum for all to come and speak, listen, be heard. I’ve read of other forums that took place, within and external to houses of worship. All of these are admirable and necessary starting points, and I applaud the leaders who initiated them. I pray the momentum remains as we embark upon nothing short of a rejuvenation of the Civil Rights era. As Professor Danielle Koonce has shared on Facebook, we are in a marathon, not a sprint. Let’s position ourselves accordingly.
#BlackLivesMatter #AllLivesMatter #JusticeforAll
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Meanwhile, back in Connieland, guess I’ll continue to think on this myself, on what actions I can take in my quest for change towards a fight to lessen racism and ensure that the scale of equity and justice is a more balanced concept.
More Leadership Lovelies #leadership
From Leadership Gold by John Maxwell
- Leadership is the ability to submerge your ego for the sake of what is best.
- Leadership is evoking in others the capacity to dream.
- Leadership is, above all, courageous.
I don’t know if many people think of leadership as courageous, but when you consider the fact that leaders often have to make tough and unpopular decisions, or make decisions based on information that is limited but all that is available at the time, there is indeed courage in those moments, and not a place where everyone would want to be. It’s not only the decision, but also the consequences, that fall on the shoulders of the leader. Cheers to good leaders!
Let’s Talk Greenleaf
For those that don’t know, Greenleaf is a new fictional show on the OWN channel (Oprah Winfrey Network) that surrounds a primarily African-American Christian megachurch, the family that runs it, and the sins, joys, challenges, and struggles that lie therein. I cannot yet tell if the purpose is to provide a conversation starting television production, highlight sins that MIGHT lie behind church doors or church-based families that have forgotten to sincerely keep God at the center of all that they do, or serve as a reminder that Christians are imperfect people who struggle just like everyone else, and not only struggle, but give in. Shoot, all of the above reasons may be irrelevant to the show’s purpose. Whatever the purpose, I pray that people remember #1) this is fiction and #2) because it is fiction, churches nor Christians should be judged according to that which is shared on the show. It’ll be interesting to see how it shapes up.
Leadership Principles
It’s no secret that I love studying leadership, though I don’t do it as fervently as I did when I was pursuing my last degree. Specifically, I appreciate gaining progressive knowledge about what it means to lead well, whether one is leading one or many. So, I recently decided to revisit some of my favorite leadership principles and decided to share them with you.
From John C. Maxwell’s Leadership Gold:
*Leadership is the passion to make a difference with others.
*Leadership is being dissatisfied with the current reality.
*Leadership is taking responsibility while others are making excuses.
**Leadership is seeing the possibilities in a situation while others are seeing the limitations.
Does any of the above linger with your heart? Do you have any to share?
Feed the Soul
“We work to feed our appetites; meanwhile our souls go hungry.”
I read this recently and my first reaction…Wow, that is profound but how true is it? Further, if it is true, what, if anything, can we do about it, individually and corporately as a society?
I decided that for many of us, it is true and the resolution is individual, for no adult soul can be force fed; we choose what we put into our soul. With that said, what are you choosing to feed your soul today? If you find that it is filled with junk, what are you doing to cleanse it?
Make the Most of What God Gives
After looking at the way things are on this earth, here’s what I’ve decided is the best way to live: Take care of yourself, have a good time, and make the most of whatever job you have for as long as God gives you life. And that’s about it. That’s the human lot. Yes, we should make the most of what God gives, both the bounty and the capacity to enjoy it, accepting what’s given and delighting in the work. It’s God’s gift! God deals out joy in the present, the now. It’s useless to brood over how long we might live.
Ecclesiastes 5:19-20 MSG version
Father’s Day – 2016
“Fathers”
The unspoken and often, unsung, heroes that anchor us. They are providers of tough love, encouragement, and the challenges that shape us and strengthen us.
Fathers are our coaches.
Fathers provide examples of what a princess should expect and what a man should be.
Fathers teach us when it’s ok to cry and when we must suck it up and press onward, when to accept defeat and when to fight for victory.
Fathers love us unconditionally.
Fathers are strength personified and love on legs.
To good fathers everywhere, thank you for giving us our first glimpse of God.